By: Joseph Kemp

Tschabalala Self Exhibition: “By My Self.”

The most recent addition to the Baltimore Museum of Art is a beautiful exhibit created by Tschabalala Self. Her exhibition consists of pieces constructed from color fabrics, paint, and other materials. One example in particular that took my attention was a piece titled, Socks, which made use of paints, fabric, and bits and bobs found around Self’s studio. The piece contained the figure of a man who appeared mostly black, constructed with differing fabrics to create something open to the interpretation of the viewer. The only discernible elements were a pair of white socks and the familiar contours and shapes of the male body. Elements included were larger hands, exaggerated musculature, and a silhouette of the male genitalia. This figure is contained within a cascade of saturated red fabric. Many of Tschabalala Self’s pieces contained similarly unusual manifestations of the human form.    

Image Taken by Joseph Kemp

I recently visited the Tschabalala Self: “By My Self” Exhibition at the Baltimore Museum of Art. Self is an artist well known for her work that explores personhood beyond a single moment. She pushes her paintings and sculptures beyond any traditional boundary applied to work of this nature. 

This technique of Self’s is the main focus of this exhibit. Her materials lack cohesion and the anatomical nature of her pieces is lacking. However, she is focusing primarily on anatomical elements of the human body that are accentuated by our society. 

Upon my initial inspection, her pieces appear like a stitched together mass of cloth, fabric, stencils, paint, or printing. Upon closer inspection, her work makes direct use of the human form in every sense imaginable. From the reproductive organs, breasts, hips, thighs, pectorals, chins, skin color, teeth, and overall facial expression. They make up core elements of how she expresses her critical inquiries into selfhood and human existence. The design of Self’s human forms maintain a rudimentary resemblance to our expectations of humanity. 

 I allowed my eye to flow with the fabrics following where they began and where they met, guiding me up the established forms. I was focused on the exhibit and so curious about its content that as I reached within my jacket to take out my notepad, I stabbed myself several times in my middle finger. This failed to stop me from analyzing the visuals before me. Even as blood leaked down my hand, I continued to explore the exhibit. I was so engrossed in the work that I didn’t even notice I was bleeding. As my eyes trailed along the forms of her piece The Father, I found myself contemplating my own selfhood. The forms, while simple in their details, were captivating to my psyche.

Image Taken by Joseph Kemp

Our culture has always shared a strong focus upon how we view ourselves in comparison to others. We thrive off the appreciation from our peers based on simple fabric-based items or our relative differences in physical appearance. These forms were not meant to mirror the fantasized form we see on television or what permeates our every moment in the digital age. Perfection is not a desire Self seems to strive for. She lives to investigate the selfhood of our identities; she cares more for how we flourish within ourselves. Self has no concern for the false appearances expected of people in society. 

 As I finished viewing the exhibit, I noticed that my finger had stopped bleeding. I stopped before moving, with my fist clenching periodically. I felt in that moment a confidence I had never felt before. I was confident in my body, I acknowledged that I could still flourish if I wished. I walked away no longer limited by the pretenses that had gripped me upon entering into this world. The feeling was momentary, but for a show to have that much of an effect upon me, I believe it speaks for itself. 

For most of my life, I have struggled with comprehending my identity and how I represent myself to others. I constantly compare myself to those around me. Yet Self seems to ignore these concerns, believing that we are not bound by the expectations of the world. She believes that we are only bound by the concepts of beauty and sex as they are manipulated by a purpose driven society. For a moment, I was so moved, I began to shed tears as though my world view had cracked at its center. 

Each of these exhibitions tested my emotions, my subconscious mind, and my sense of peace. If you get a chance, I advise seeing these exhibitions. During this tough time in our society, visiting these exhibitions would most definitely be worth the 45 minutes that you are allowed. There are a limited number of occupants allowed in the exhibitions, which grant the viewer a sense of silence and self-introspection. The quiet and welcoming corridors of the museum offer a moment of peace from the chaos of social media. 

Sequestered away in a corner room with a limited capacity of people allowed in, was a sculpture for Self’s exhibition set aside from the rest. This was where I experienced the most important moment of my visit. As I entered, I was greeted by two outstretched hands of black and lightened brown reaching to each other across the right wall. Across from the entrance lay two pieces depicting a man and a woman within an abstracted living space. The man to the right appears to be wearing a pair of blue pants with his legs formed in a split with the genitals drooping down to the left. The upper torso appears to be a navy blue with slight distortions along the side hip and upper back of the figure. The face is formed with paints as the skin tone, pencil marks to create lips, and a mop of gray fabric for hair. He is placed next to a pink lamp and seated on an intense black carpet. 

Imaged sourced from https://www.pilarcorrias.com/

To the left, the woman is lounging spread across a two-tone pink carpet with her painted legs spread apart, revealing what appears to be a thong made from painted fabric. As your eyes travel up, her skin is covered by crisscrossing fabric checkerboard patterns, paint, and what appears to be a belt around her midsection. This woman seems to lack any breasts, as her upper torso consists of a warm brown color that creates her skin tone. Finally, you reach her face. Her face appears to be constructed with two or three different gray and black fabrics, with pencil marks and red paint to create textures, rich lips and eye makeup. Her forehead is topped with a pink and black spotted headband with rich black strands of fabric to form her hair.  

I nearly bumped into a sculpture that sat in the center of the quiet environment. Upon entry, this sculpture appears like a woman bound at her feet by pink ankle socks. The sculpture is painted in dark skin tones. The color pink existed as clothes covering her buttocks and folding onto the back of the piece. Upon moving around to the other side, I found that it was never her top half, rather it was another set of legs and feet. What shocked me most was the rainbow genitalia that was painted central to the sculpture. 

Image Sourced from Baltimore Museum of Art

As I had fully evaluated my surroundings I took that moment to live in this space with only myself. I breathed freely, safe from the prying eyes of other museum-goers. I was so lost in this experience that I was visibly startled when two more people entered the limited space. Yet none of us spoke, we seemed to only exist as individuals in this space. 

As I left, I wiped the tears from my eyes, satisfied with my visit. I recommend that upon your visit, you silence your devices and just exist within these exhibitions for a moment. Be at peace with yourself and acknowledge that the world does not shape or define you. You need only evolve within yourself.